Just recently, the Cleveland Indians had their name changed. The Washington Redskins are determining a new name. The Kansas City Chiefs are not far behind and radical Democrats have even pushed for the New York Jets to change their name due to global warming nonsense.
What would happen if every offended group could push for the name change of every NFL team? Obvious PETA, People for the Ethic Treatment of Animals would demand every football team with an animal should have their name changed. Therefore we will no longer have the Arizona Cardinals, Atlanta Falcons, Baltimore Ravens, Buffalo Bills, Carolina Panthers, Chicago Bears, Cincinnati Beagles, Detroit Lions, Denver Broncos, Indianapolis Colts, Los Angeles Rams, Jacksonville Jaguars, Philadelphia Eagles, Miami Dolphins or Seattle Seahawks.
PETA and the Global Warming wackos will also make a case for the Green Bay Packers to remove their name in association with cheese as cows produced milk and with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) calling for the extermination of cows, the Green Bay Packers must comply in the cancelled culture of today’s Democrats.
Next the Democrat wackos will call for removal of more football teams’ names. Obviously, Cowboys fought the Indians so therefore the Dallas Cowboys must change their name. Then you have the Vikings and 49ers that were white. Obviously they must be cancelled since they are racist. Of course, the big one is the Patriots. According to the Democrats, those who are patriotic and support the Patriots of America are racist and must have their name. The Raiders and Buccaneers represent pirates and therefore since historically they were primarily white, they must be cancelled. The Texans must have their name changed because Texas was in the south during the Civil War and therefore grouping them together is racist.
Next the Cleveland Browns must be cancelled because “brown” may be offensive to those with brown skin. Then you have the Steelers. They must be cancelled because steel represents the industrial revolution of early America and therefore it is racist. The San Diego Chargers represent electricity and power; but it is the wrong type of power because they don’t represent solar or wind so they must be cancelled. The Saints must be cancelled as well since they represent a religious segment and religion must be removed for society and separated from the culture. Next the Titans must be cancelled along with the Giants because their name entitles them to be superior and intimidating to the opposing teams.
So there you have it. All of the NFL football teams must have their name changed due to some group of people being offended. So what shall we call the teams? We can change their names to the Seattle Rain, Chicago Wind, San Francisco Fog, Denver Snow, Phoenix Heat, Pittsburgh Windmills and the Las Vegas Solar to name a few. Since Washington is still looking for a new name, the Washington Radicals may fit well.
Each team must play nice and wrapped in bubble wrap so no one gets hurt. Of course, there will be no more Super Bowl because only one team wins and that will hurt the feelings of the other 31 teams and their fans so radical Democrats can force the Super Bowl to become a special place for all fans to come together to see their team get their Participation Trophy.
Now in the mind of Democrats, everyone is happy, no one is offended. And for the fan who is still upset at all this Cancelled Culture NFL Name Change Nonsense, you must have voted for Trump.
By Frank Aquila
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Frank Aquila is president of the San Joaquin-Stanislaus Conservative Patriots and author of the book, “Sarah Palin Out of Nowhere”. He can be emailed at firstname.lastname@example.org